Becoming Ungovernable

trust economics is the place to bury your money

Greetings my lovelies and a splendid happy new year of the water rabbit. It is a bit late but these damn meanderings of mine take time and everything seems slow to get going through muddy January, however I am quite curious and also slightly unnerved (a very rabbit thing) to learn that we are entering a year of nothing much but rest, sex and gossip, oh and also deep dive meanderings into beyond death, all from the auspices of the ancient traditional Chinese calendar. And yes I am dipping into another cultures wisdom pot for guidance and inspiration even though we are all very much meant to be in our own lanes (clearly capitalized) with our identity obvious so that how we connect, how we are in relationship, how we relate to rules can be given the appropriate QC code, such a wonderful upgrade from the rather defunct credit score. And while we are busy resting we can rest assured that all the things are changing all the time overseen apparently by the looming cloud of the mysterious elite. Far more on top of things than our elected officials who I can barely understand and who apparently have already been corrupted by deep state Ai to say anything imaginable. Heads up! Todays musing are going to be peppered with links of interest and point and will wander in and out of what the water wabbit will bring so grab a cup of tea, have nothing to do and snuggle into self possession for simply put, the rabbit is lunch for everyone and if you’re not present for you, some hungry ghost or lazy spirit or even your fav belligerent sub-stacker will surely try to occupy any vacancy going because we all know how scarce real estate is these days.

Art of Maquenda. Damn I love this artist

Which brings me onto this morning ramblings…rules rules, how they rely on the communal agreement of more than one, how they are a reflection of priorities and relationships, how they tie into trust and how they define us as a society and also how this year, indicated by that oh so dreamy water rabbit and well our general resonance, how rules out of context can be so absurd to be meaningless and then dangerous if you should happen to be sucked into that particular odd circumstance where it actually effects you or that even more strange circumstance when your being gamed. Because rules rely on honesty, which means we need to be able to trust each other and to know that our goals are somewhat all aligned. For those of you interested in the math of such a thing, Mathew Crawford turned me onto this incredible website that goes through how game theory relates to trust visually and is also a game itself! How meta can you get?

The evolution of trust by Nikki Case

What I am looking forward to in this year of the rabbit, this dreamy swoon, this dive into the intuitions, this lull where nothing really but life happens, where goals and ambitions and the necessary leadership around such goals becomes slightly meaningless and where how we are facilitated and who with becomes so much more pertinent. During this year of deep mystery, as we nest into our burrows, becoming intimate with our people, our tribe, our place of belonging, knowing who and how we want to be in close connection takes on a high priority.

there is nothng more human than the desire to belong, belong to our people where we are understood, seen and can be at home.

Who’s tribe do you belong to? And where are your people?

(And if you’re wondering if I included my tribe, within the small sample provided, its there, you just cant see it. I, like you, have worked hard in often mysterious and not easily understandable ways to become a member of one of the incredible yet completely invisible middle aged women of the world! It’s an extraordinary tribe (as tribes are so often) mainly because not only are we well resourced with things like mad manifestation skills, passive incomes and hordes of adult children at our bidding but hardly anyone notices what we do. Let me tell you peeps we are well set for becoming ungovernable. And can easily skip to the front of annoying queues and other such invisible super powery things)

Because lovelies in this year of the water rabbit things are going to get weirder than we could imagine, the year where we collectively take out buckets of longing down to the other side, through the underworld to the unimaginable, the nirvana that we have worked so hard to reach, what with all the trials and tribulations of last years tiger stripes. We will be there with our hopes and dreams in the halos of unspeakable beauty and light of the peach blossom spring, dreaming up seeds of the future.

And even though looking forward to the soupiness of connection, the utter weirdness of the unknown, I can already feel my ears twitching and my legs thumping at the thought of shifting my relationship with control, that constant grip of knowing that requires my judgement and therefore critical assessment, the often exhaustion of this that just leads me to be cynical (and ultimately checked out with overwhelm). So to loosen this tight jawed, absolute somatic stand in the all knowing and rigidity is somewhat exciting and twitchy all at the same time. To be lost in the gaze and wonder and dreaming of what I’m longing for and receiving unimaginable guidance from the lunar world.

Two wonderful Year of the rabbit in-depth write ups

What does my heart yearn for this year? What mystical reaches can I grasp to align myself with? Where will I nest and who with in this time of rest and connection? What practices will resonate with this to bloom and seed interest, eros in being alive? What am I going to swim in while I create seeds ripe for the manifestation of next years wood Dragon?

Some things that have already happened - I decided to become part of the Accidental Gods group where we just happen to be working on setting intention, something that humans are very good at doing apparently, despite all appearances that we like to simply sit around in existential angst and worry. Also my tarot readings for my people have become so clear as to feel surreal, like I’m being handed guided instructions that I just pass on. With bullet points. And I started a specific herbal substack that doesn’t wonder off into long musings about what makes us tick. These feel like good omens because honestly while our tribes are barely recognized, much criticized and pitted against each other let alone without place and untethered in the ethers, it is unnerving to live within our present agreed upon behavior, rules, laws, the old abide by me in our fragmented communities with a demented mothership floundering around like an infected fungal ant in charge.

But do we have to? Abide by rules and laws? Do we engage in the constant bickering of which ones work well when? Or do we just decide to change our idea about who sets them?

Aha! I have wondered through the lobster bisque to the consommé!

And so I ask you my lovelies, who sets your rules? What sets your rules? And are they grooving for you?

I call this substack updates from the undergrowth because I’m often in the weeds. Its what brings me my medicine and its a perspective I like to gaze from, often on my back. It keeps me somewhat humble. And that’s why I’m talking about being ungovernable because weeds are still some of the absolute champions of belonging while remaining unruly and are about the only wilderness that we encounter, often.

Although this Dali Ai art is pretty wild…..

And I have really started to understand that everything I touch in my daily life has been given to me not by chance, bidding, luck or desire but by a hell of a lot of people all agreeing to certain things. I mean if you just think of the chain of events required, all done by agreement between people to say create a lightbulb…we have to agree on the resource use and then management and then facilitation, then creation and then the reproduction and then the spread and propagation and this all has an incredible ripple effect from all the people digging and taking the resources from the earth to the factory to the machinery and how that got made to the payroll and the vacation home and the kids and their friends and schools etc, all because we agree that being able to have lightbulbs is a good thing (and are they? Well sure in some contexts they are just great)……I mean honestly it blows my mind at simply how entrenched we are in these agreements. And how they ripple out. And what all these connections mean. Let alone when you work with energetics and see those layers on top of the simple physical manifestation of the things. But damn the Agreements we are constantly acquiescing too. Just in the first ten minutes of getting up.

And I know this can feel extremely boring and overwhelming in what it actually means to you and me, but I carry it. Mind, body and spirit. These agreements. To deny that they don’t belong to me, that they are not apart of me just goes back to that endless checking out and damn if it ain’t my one precious life so I think I really need to pay attention.

And now it’s becoming clearer and clearer in this matrix of agreements that creating change, finding ways to create change, flow with change, feeling into the leverage points of change requires an understanding of the distribution of power, the rules around that and requires knowing the goals of the system which is the mindset or paradigm out of which the system — its goals, power structure, rules, its culture — arises.

Those goals - which brings to us everything we do in our world when we wake up - to squeezing our toothpaste, to the coffee, to the sandwich we make, to the car we drive, to the phone and headphones, lap top, bank and couch - are all those things that make our life comfortable and safe. And indeed my inkling is that we all agree to this overwhelming desire that we live in comfort, convenience and safety. It seems to be what holds all of these agreements together.

And when we look and see just how few players there are in the ownership of the infrastructure, its distribution of resources (power) then I might wonder what their tribe is like? What might be their agreements? Do we align? How come I’m completely dependent on their goals even though I live in a very different place, mind, body and spirit? That the idea of living in beauty and aliveness and well just plain time management might have a different context for those few. And yes I do know how exhausting and impotent it is to think about. But honestly as far as I’m concerned I’m living my life in agreement to it, acting it out on the daily and that matters to me.

(Just how it matters that although its insanely easy now to steal from value village because of self check outs, how I can even justify it with their ridiculous prices, I still dont agree with becoming a thief. I know that if thats how I identify, even for a brief period of time, it’s going to take up space from other ways that I want to be. And this isn’t a criticism of thieving or thief’s. As if that isn’t the core of the current system! Its just not how I want to roll right now)

To deny that the 100 people or so are having a conversation that we are not invited to and aren’t part of is just plain stupid. Head in the sand silly. And no i’m not talking about our elected officials, those wannabes. And even though I might make the herculean effort to create my own oat milk from the very oats I grow on my balcony and get to drink this special elixir 4 times a year to the loud applause of instagram, the other 500 billion little things I do depend on my agreements with all of you, all of us here depending upon these couple of folks who’s plans, intentions, ideals and just damn heartfelt eye to eye who the hell are you I’m not privy to. I don’t have a clue what they are thinking or need or desire. Not one. I’m told its for my safety and comfort but do I know what the few couple of multi billionaires who own everything think? Dream of? Do I know what kind of future they are longing for? To guess just makes me horribly cynical. The kinda of Town Hall cynical. At least a decade ago I believed that this is what I had voted for. And here we are, on the daily, in an agreement and well it just feels shady. Heavy. Not tenable. These agreements with our human gods. Some of us might be happy and secure in the knowledge that it’s all for our benefit but a lot of us aren’t really feeling that and a lot of us are suffering. Hurting. The world, if all the lung stuff thats going around has any indication of, seems to be in grief.

I like to make my agreements with something beyond me, mysterious and more in the likeness of the miracle that is life. Agreements that resonates with my tribe and my place in the world, that actual piece of land that provides for me, holds me and nurtures me. That contains perspective and holds context. Listening to the sacred and profound. Talking to the weeds.

So how can we be more ungovernable? Less part of this orchestrated commerce? And does this mean I have to give up my comfort and safety?

Personally I think that if we are going to start anywhere context is a really good thing to focus on. And so my ungovernable ones I urge you to feel into the god of context this year, just like the weeds. To put into practice the incredible training we have undergone, thanks to one of our reliable chaos agents who we have lived with for all of our lives and before remembering, the virus. Those incredible tiny weeny Yodas that push us to stretch and adapt in context. To carry on practicing transparency within our communities. To carry on finding our truths so that we can be clear and transparent about our desires within the context of our communities. Our environments.

(for those of you desiring to absolutely control your environments, albeit how ever unnatural that may be, I welcome you to your new home)

To carry on the practice of not only centering and grounding ourselves in our own truth but accepting and giving grace that we each have that right, that ability. That we each have the right to know what is true for us means that we can start moving towards our incredible ability of how to be in collaboration with each other while holding respect for individual truth. Take context out of that practice and the whole thing falls apart.

And one thing I do know about those 1% who own and distribute everything, they don’t have room for context. The agreements would start to fall apart as nothing would make sense. Which is what I am feeling here down in the peach blossom spring of the seed making time. It’s not sense that creates seeds. Not logic, not rules - more a longing to be vibrant, in beauty, in life with the sentience that is life, including each other.

Again I look to the weeds and their seeds who are expert collaborators while at the same time being very different in character and worth. They all play a part and indeed they are an orchestration of an entity who comes from a place we don’t remember and is part of a force we can’t imagine but are a living part of. Belonging to nature whose immense and incredible wild wisdom can be summed up as a seeking and bringing of balance so that life thrives. And personally, if I am going to celebrate life , being part of these agreements that bring me to exhaustion and impotence and despair are not actually comfortable or safe and they are only convenient because I’m not doing anything different.

adam williamson art made for my sister and her husband

Does this mean I run of screaming into the wilderness naked and bare and not talking to anyone who doesn’t dare to wear shoes that they sewed together with their own hair and fingernails? Well sort off but its not really any kind of solution…Is this the last substack that I write on my accursed computer responsible for all the evils in the world? It does start to sound like that doesn’t it, as we search for those leverage points, as we dig around dancing in that universal constant, change, so that we can be nice and juicy and flexible when it occurs. Oh yes Progress is evil, must go back to the savage land…….when instead we are all here right now, with our dreams and longings that have brought us all here right now to this place beyond the moon, this year of the already dead where we get to feel into what story’s our truths will tell, what intentions we want to see made real.

So I encourage you all this year, in the year of the water rabbit, to dream deep and dream big about what seeds your longings will create, in readiness for the all-powerful dragon of manifestation waiting to blow sweat aliveness into next year, where we get to plant our dreams, hatched out in our nested burrows with our tribespeople. I encourage you to dust off your ungovernable gods, gods that are wild and not at all human, dont have acronyms and are yours and ask of yourself, what do you long for? What are your desires and how do you want to be recognized in your community, to be seen in your tribe, for surely you are not surviving here on your own. And to work within your intimate community so that there is agreement, agreements that dont feel heavy or wrong or make you despair. It might not feel safe or comfortable. You might have to become ungovernable.